City Holds ‘Demystifying Democracy’ Panel Discussion for America’s 250th

For the nation’s semiquincentennial, Falls Church 250 keeps the democracy celebrations rolling. 

The City hosted a “Demystifying Democracy” panel discussion and workshop at Mary Riley Styles Public Library (MRSPL) on Saturday, Sept. 26, with a strong turnout of over 40 participants, nearly half of whom were high school-age Youth Representatives from Citizens for a Better City (CBC), a co-sponsor of the event along with Falls Church Forward. 

“Join us for this practical ‘how-to’ guide to civic engagement featuring elected officials representing Falls Church sharing their own stories, lessons learned, and advice for getting involved!,” the City wrote on its open-to-the-public invitations to the free afternoon event with featured panelists: Vikram Iyer, Outreach Representative at the Office of U.S. Senator Mark R. Warner, Saddam Salim, Va. State Senator (D-37), Letty Hardi, City of Falls Church Mayor, and Bethany Henderson, FCCPS School Board Member. 

“Come with questions, leave with ideas, and find your own way to make an impact in Falls Church,” the invite read. 

After visiting the Falls Church Farmers Market across the way on a beautiful early fall Saturday morning, The Falls Church Independent dropped into MRSPL to attend the Demystifying Democracy event. What sort of advice and lessons might the panelists share? And, what sort of crowd might attend?

We found the diverse audience enthusiastic to listen, learn, and engage thoughtfully in the workshop activities, and the political panelists surprisingly candid, personal, and deeply thoughtful in their responses to the questions posed by skillful moderator Ross Litkenhous, Chair of the City’s Economic Development Authority and former City Council member, and crafted by event organizer Holly Irwin, Arts and Humanities Coordinator, Falls Church Recreation and Parks Department, and Staff Liaison to the City’s 250 Committee.

The City Council’s longest serving member, David Snyder launched the event with a few words on the significance of celebrating American independence from England in 1776. Quoting John Adams, from his famous 1777 letter to his wife Abigail, Snyder read aloud Adams’s bristling message to posterity, “....you will never know how much it costs the present generation to preserve your freedom. I hope you will make a good use of it. If you do not, I shall repent in Heaven that I ever took half the pains to preserve it.” Snyder added, “So we're all part of that posterity.” And asked, “Are we going to make good use of it?”

Emcee for the panel discussion, former Council member Ross Litkenhous, then took the floor. Before introducing the panelists he said, “This is obviously an important event and a continuation of a lot of what the 250 Committee is doing. And I think, in our current political environment, this type of discourse and this type of transparency with our elected officials and others is incredibly important.”

Looking out at the participants, Litkenhous added, “Love to see so many students here and young folks taking an interest both in this event as well as Virginia 250 and hopefully setting the foundation for participation in a healthy democracy going forward.”

A Creative Workshop

After remarks and introductions, event organizer Holly Irwin launched a creative workshop activity. Participants were divided into four discussion circles based on a civics-based personality questionnaire each participant had completed. The Youth Representatives were then tasked to moderate separate discussion circles for the self-identified “nurturers, defenders, amplifiers, and connectors.”

As the four groups began their circle-discussions, I chatted with Irwin to gather insight into how the event came together. “So this idea stemmed from, honestly, being in a place personally of feeling helpless with what’s happening in the country. Obviously I can't do everything, but I can do something within my own sphere, right?,” Irwin said. “And so leading the 250 initiatives for the City, has lined up as this perfect opportunity.”

Irwin and librarian Paula Hawkins had brainstormed together to plan Demystifying Democracy. They decided the hook to capture participants’ interest was to explore the passions driving people’s public service. “What if we talk to our elected officials on a more personal note – less about policies and procedures and more about, ‘What do you love about it and why? And what do you do to make it better? Because so many things are going wrong. But, we can all work collectively to make our local environment and community work for us.”

With the circle discussions winding up, Irwin quickly explained to me why she thought the workshop format chosen was helpful. The format served as both an ice breaker and a trust builder. “It just makes people a little bit more comfortable…. Some people are really shy,” Irwin said. “Some people are really loud. So that quiz I had everybody take, I really liked how it kind of categorized folks into those four categories, and then people can talk amongst like-minded individuals.”

How Did You Get Involved in Politics and Civic Life?

Now it was time for the panel discussion. Moderator Litkenhous asked the panelists to, “Think back to when you first became involved in your community and civic engagement, and tell us what motivated you….” Teasingly, he invited Mayor Hardi to go first, saying, “And I'll start here closest to me, Mayor Letty Hardi. Take a sip of water. That's not hot. So, I expect an eloquent response here.”

Hardi smiled and began describing her inspiring beginnings in public service, “....So those of you who knew me before I ran for office, I had no political experience. I had taken a pause in my career when I had three kids under the age of four and had actually gone out to dinner with a friend for her birthday. And we were paying attention to the local budget season for the spring. And because I'm a nerd, we're like, ‘Let's go to City Hall on a Monday night during budget season.’”

“And we walk in, and – Dave [Snyder] might remember this because he was up on the dais – And they were debating the budget, and they were debating how much to pay teachers, and they were debating Founders Row,” the mayor continued. “Founders Row at that time was still Sunoco gas station and Lazy Mike's before the development. This was 2016 or so. And I remember thinking, ‘Gosh. It's Monday night, zero 7:30. I know what I’d normally be doing, which is putting my kids to bed, and probably not being at City Hall. But I looked around the room, and I was, like, ‘Where is the next generation? This is a really important discussion because I care a whole lot about, you know, how much teachers get paid. I care a whole lot about economic development in the city,’ and I wanted to make sure the next generation of voices was represented in City Hall. So, even though I had no political experience, I'm leaning over to my friend, Erin, and I'm like, ‘I'll run if you run.’ So she ran on the School Board and I ran on the City Council with no experience.”

State Senator Salim then recalled how, just after high school, he and two friends had attended a local Democratic party event shortly after President Obama was elected. The “country was going in a different direction,” they believed optimistically. After arriving at the event, however, Salim and his two friends – one a Somalian-American and the other former Va. Lt. Gov. Justin Fairfax – felt like outsiders. “And it hit the three of us that the three of us in this room did not look like anybody else in the room at all. So we all sort of looked at one another and said, ‘We're going to continue to get involved. And that was really the point where we felt, you know, the previous generation of folks did not get that same opportunity. And unless we get involved, that won’t be there.”

"I never wanted to run for office,” Salim said, but eventually his high school friend was elected a state senator in Minnesota, Justin Fairfax would become Virginia’s Lt. Governor, and Salim would be elected to the Virginia state assembly. “It was kind of an inside joke between the three of us – 'Two of us got elected. What happened to Saddam?’”

“I always wanted to be the person behind the scenes…. until there was a real need,” Salim said.

School Board member Bethany Henderson then told a harrowing story of how she plunged into the civic sphere. “For me, it goes back to childhood,” she said. “I grew up in South Louisiana in the eighties when [former Ku Klux Klan Wizard] David Duke was a viable gubernatorial candidate. And I'm Jewish and was very othered in South Louisiana in that era. Very othered. And many of my classmates did not see David Duke's candidacy as a big deal. And my family, my dad, my uncle, my parents, my grandparents had always been very civically active because you had to be to stake out space and to have your rights as a Jewish person in South Louisiana. So at that time, you know, they signed on to letters they took out in the newspaper against David Duke.”

“But our family got death threats,” Henderson said. “And it was an important learning experience about the importance of standing up even when it's hard. So that's something I've always carried with me.”

Sen. Mark Warner’s Outreach Representative Vikram Iyer then surprised everyone with his story of how he first entered the political realm. “Well, I stunk at STEM, and I needed a job,” he joked. “Okay, it was a little bit of that, but no – I would say my first interaction with any sort of local or civic engagement was actually seeing my dad. I grew up in Loudon County in the suburbs. And we had a basketball hoop on the driveway, and I was an avid basketball player. And a couple of other folks in the community had basketball hoops as well. But then one day, there was a storm and the wind blew down every single basketball hoop in that community except ours.”

“But ours was facing the road,” Iyer continued. “Everyone else’s had fallen over. But then my dad got a certified letter from the HOA that we were in violation of whatever the statute was.” So the hoop would have to come down. So Iyer’s father proceeded to rally his neighbors to sign a petition of protest against the HOA’s decision. Iyer was a little embarassed by it all and asked, ‘Is this really such a big deal, what we’re making about this basketball hoop?” But his father persisted, developing a clever tactic to go door-to-door with Iyer’s younger sister so that the neighbor’s would answer the door.

“So that was my first, like, ‘Wow!,’ Iyer said. “This is what happens when you bring community together. And I just sort of ended up in the political space through no fault of my own, just in my own interests, and I managed to do it alright.”

What Do You Wish You Had Known?

When asked “what you wish you had known when you first decided to jump in to participate in your community and in civic life?,” Senator Salim reflected that he wished he had gotten involved in civic affairs earlier. “Don’t be afraid to get involved,” he wishes he could tell his earlier self. “And I wish somebody had told me back then, ‘It’s okay to go explore, get involved in your community, and do something outside this box you were put in,” such as becoming a “doctor or lawyer,” in his case.

School Board member Henderson wished she had known that politics isn’t just about talking all the time. “It’s more about listening than about talking.” On the School Board, she needs to listen to the “whole community and try to understand where everybody’s coming from and to balance what are always competing interests, needs, and concerns.”

Iyer wished he knew how much he had grown up in a “little bubble,” where everybody thinks the same way. As a senator’s representative it’s highly important to understand people's vastly differing perceptions and needs, in communities across the Commonwealth. 

Mayor Hardi wished she had understood earlier how important it is to “not be afraid to ask the hard questions.” In a classroom, she analogized, “someone’s always afraid to raise their hand first. And oftentimes, when you raise you hand and actually ask a question, that elicits more conversation and better discussion.”

Dealing with Disrespect

Asked “What do you do when you care deeply about your community, but you don’t always feel welcome or respected by the people around you?,” School Board member Henderson responded, “It's a great question. Certainly part of my lived experience. For me, my choice was to talk more …. [and] to use every opportunity where someone inquired to take it as curiosity as opposed to take it as insult.” As a child, Henderson had to deal with other students asking her, “Where are your horns?,” or “Why did you kill Jesus?,” or other offensive, stereotypical interrogations. 

“And obviously, you don't talk to everybody because some people are just not safe to talk to,” Henderson added. “But if I were asked by a peer or by someone who felt, you know, like, they might actually listen, I would use that opportunity to try and educate. And I still try to do that. If someone's asking, my first thought is not, ‘Oh my god, they're so offensive. What's wrong with them?’” Instead, she learned to consider “Why are they asking? Because it's like, ‘Oh, I have an opportunity to actually help somebody see something differently and at least put that out there in the world.”

On the same question, Iyer reflected that “on social media…. We feel more siloed than ever. But the key is to look for shared understandings. There are always opportunities to "find common ground with other people.” As he travels throughout Virginia for political outreach, he's found he’s able to “get along great” with Republicans on the Fauquier County Board of Supervisors, “because, at the end of the day, we all realize our goal is the same. So when you feel like you’re not in a place where you’re welcome, odds are there's someone else" with that same feeling.

Mayor Hardi copes with prejudice or not feeling “welcomed or respected,” by “modeling the behavior I expect [from others.]” Citing Michelle Obama’s saying, ‘When they go low, we go high,” Hardi added, “I always try to be respectful and say, ‘I understand you're really upset about this, and we disagree.’ But I never try to get emotional because I think it’s important to stay professional in those contexts.” 

It’s also really important to “start from a place of understanding ‘Why is it you feel this way?,’ Hardi said. “I know parking was one thing that came up in our small group discussion. It's a really controversial topic, right? And so a lot of people are really emotional about it. So I'd ask questions like, ‘Okay. Why are you really upset about this particular issue? Why are you feeling triggered?'.... So having a conversation, modeling a behavior, being respectful, and trying to ask questions rather than getting triggered by the behavior you're seeing.”

Hardi also stressed the importance of “assuming positive intent” from everyone when “walking into a meeting,” because “nobody wakes up thinking, ‘How can I make somebody else’s life miserable.’”

State Senator Salim reflected, “You know, I was thinking about this question. And, I tend to show up. There's not a shortage of times for me where – if I were to drive from here to Richmond – I don't meet somebody or I don't hear about somebody who does not like me. They don't want me here. I've had my own colleagues tell me, ‘Don't come to my district unless you're packing’ [a weapon]. But to me, I was like, ‘I don't know what you’re talking about. And it turns out, I was in his district a couple days [later].... And for me, it's really important just to show up and to prove to them that it's not about the conversations I have with them. It is more about the people they also neglect to represent.” 

“So I think many of you know I carry the Assault Weapons Ban, the Accessory Dwelling Unit, and the housing issues. And I've never seen the number of people who are so passionate at 7 a.m. about housing – being sort of anti-housing at seven in the morning – and then a line out the door to a whole protest because they felt their Second Amendment rights were going to be taken away. And they were handing out magazines they're giving out to children, and to everyone else.” 

“But you know, I go up there. And I continue to talk,” Salim said. “And a lot of times my staff will tell me there are certain things you should not be doing such as going to these events where you're not welcome. And I say, ‘That's what they don't want us to do, to go out there and really learn from the folks who really have issues. So I've been doing a lot of that and saying – especially with the Second Amendment folks where there's a whole poster out there of my head on a pitchfork – When you know every single one of them don't want you to be there, it's a different feeling knowing that what you're doing is you're protecting that one kid in a random school who could be subject to gun violence. You're doing something that's going to impact somebody else's life that you’ll never meet, that you never have an idea of, but this is the moment to be courageous and do it.”

In his own mosque, Salim has also advocated for LGBTQ+ rights. At first he experienced naysaying by the “gatekeepers” there, but over time, sympathetic members began showing up, helping his initiative grow. “I was told, ‘You can’t talk about these issues,’” Salim said. “But instead of saying, ‘I’m not coming back,’ I went back every Friday and talked about these issues until the people realized, ‘Wait a minute. This is maybe something we need to care about.’”

While the “gatekeepers will try to gatekeep you from getting to those [sympathetic] people,” Salim said, if you keep speaking up, you’ll start to find others who care. “So I use that as an example, and I tell this to a lot of folks because, in the last couple years, that has set the stage for every bill I carry. I met with the pro Second Amendment folks at my office. They yelled at me. But, at the end of it, I think they got out what they needed to get out, and they knew my bill was not going to change. I knew their minds were not going to get changed, but they could go home and say, ‘Look. I talked to him. I yelled at him.’ But at the end of the day, we got what we needed to get done.”

“....The business of public service comes with a lot of different issues and it comes with a lot of harm, but somebody has to do it,” Salim emphasized. “And if we're not courageous enough, are we setting the right example for the next generation?”

What Do You Love About Public Service?

Asked what they “love or care deeply about” in serving their constituents and the community, Mayor Hardi said, “It's the people. I think it started very early on when I was really impressed by how smart, talented, and committed our citizenry is…. When I go to a career day at the middle school or high school and the kids always have really great ideas about how they want to see Falls Church evolve. And the adults who serve on our boards and commissions and the talent of the people that are just willing to roll up their sleeves and volunteer their time. I was really impressed by that, I guess, very early on.”

Because the community’s input is so helpful in policymaking, Hardi said, she writes a weekly rather than a monthly blog that invites feedback and puts a major emphasis on her office hours where everyone’s welcome.

Despite the sometimes hostile political atmosphere for Senator Salim, he “really, really likes almost all” of his constituents, he said. He credits their thoughtful input for helping him carry 21 bills in the Va. Senate right now. From 3:30 to 7 p.m. each work day, he allots 15 minute parcels of time to individual constituents to hear their concerns. And most of them have already tried to problem-solve on their own, so they’re able to better outline their struggles. Frequently, he even calls individual constituents to ask if they’ll testify in the Senate about their concerns. 

School Board member Henderson said, “One of the things I always keep front of mind is there's nothing more personal than your kid and what's happening with your kid. And I am so impressed by how many members of our community, students, and families take on active roles, but also volunteer quietly…. And these are people choosing to do it because they care about the community. And the students who serve on boards and commissions, students who start clubs. To me, that's really cool because it's people taking ownership of their own experience and choosing to engage.”

How to Get Started

Asked what they’d advise young people to do to channel their passions into civic or political action, Mayor Hardi emphasized not being overwhelmed by the big issues and problems and just taking small steps first based on your interests. “Like, climate change is this big overwhelming issue, right? So, 'How do I get involved in that?' How would one person in Falls Church, one high schooler solve that? Join the club, environmental club. Just show up to the meeting and just start with one little action.” And the mayor added, you could also “go ride your bike or go walk,” to take a step on reducing greenhouse gas emissions.

Surprisingly, Sen. Salim emphasized starting with learning how to use technology to reach out to others who might share your concerns. “Given the atmosphere and the world we're in, technology is where I think…. this generation should start. Whether it's a Facebook group or you know, now there are groups in different platforms you can start.”

“....Maybe fifteen years ago when I was in high school, I had to go in front of, like, 10 people and hope that they'd go talk to 10 more people. But now, with the push of a button, I can get to a thousand people within five seconds…. I learned this when I was campaigning. I did zero phone calls. Zero phone banking. I realized no one's gonna answer your calls. So we went digital. We went to TikTok. We went to Twitter. We went to Facebook, and that's where we found the collective group that really cared about some of those issues.”

School Board member Henderson urged the young people in the audience to begin by reaching out to people with different perspectives and experiences. “Go have a conversation with someone who hangs out with different people than you do, who has a different life experience than you do – not for an agenda – but just to make that connection…. It’s from that human connection…. that opportunities grow.”

Social Media: Turn On or Turn Off?

On the final question about managing burnout in political and civic work, panelists emphasized the importance of setting clear boundaries and concentrating on maintaining work-life balance. But one interesting difference in views emerged. While Sen. Salim had advocated for engaging with social media, Sen. Warner’s Outreach Representative Iyer surprised the audience by saying he’s taken himself off social media in his private life to avoid burnout.

“Thank you guys so much for being accessible to the audience here, your transparency, being very candid, and these have just been incredibly insightful answers,” moderator Litkenhous concluded, before thanking the organizers, audience, panelists, and host, Council member Snyder. 

Council member Snyder then closed with a helpful summary of the lessons drawn from the panelists' discussion. And he concluded by citing Justice Learned Hand who said in 1944: “The spirit of liberty is the spirit which seeks to understand the minds of other men and women. The spirit of liberty is the spirit which weighs their interests alongside its own without bias…. Liberty lies in the hands of men and women. When it dies there, no constitution, no law, no court can save it.”

Chats with the Moderator and the Mayor

As the meeting concluded, I cornered moderator Litkenhouse to ask how he thought the panel discussion went. “I think it was wonderful,” he said. “What I really enjoyed was the cross section of the community that joined us. It's good to see young and old, everybody in between, and folks that I know are from different political, economic, and cultural backgrounds. Having everybody here in one room to listen to what I thought was a fantastic panel was just a really exciting thing to be a part of.”

Litkenhouse agreed the panelists were surprisingly candid and thoughtful, rather than simply political, in their remarks. “I've known most of the folks in this panel for a very long time, and I learned something unique about each of them,” he said. “And I think some of the answers were really raw. And, we talk a lot about passion when it comes to community engagement, and I think you certainly saw some of the passion in these answers as well.”

“...And in most cases, you know, these are volunteer positions,” Litkenhous said of the panalists' political offices. “But it also shows just how accessible these types of things are to the layperson or anybody in the community. And I think what really resonated with them – and the passion that came through some of the answers – is that you just show up, start small, and get involved in the things that you care about. It doesn't have to be something huge.”

Litkenhouse also praised the Citizens for a Better City and their Youth Representatives program. “The CBC has done a great job with their Student Rep program,” he said. “And we had a lot of CBC Student Reps here. So I think it's great that they want to spend part of their Saturday afternoon here learning about democracy and how they can get involved in the community…. I think it's great seeing this generation step up and taking an interest in helping solve the problems of the next generation.”

At last, we sidled up to Mayor Hardi to find out what she thought of the Demystifying Democracy event. “You hear about how civic engagement's declining across the U.S., but I really like to think that Falls Church is bucking that trend. So I've given a lot of thought to what makes Falls Church special. And I do think we do a really good job – from the kids to the adults – of giving ways for people to participate in government and making their voices heard in democracy.”

“I think civic involvement doesn't have to be political,” Hardi said. “Civic involvement could very much be like, ‘I'm going to go join the garden club.’ Or, I want to make my community more pretty with more flowers and shrubs, right?.... it's really about building community and building civic life.”

Mayor Hardi was also inspired by the large turnout of Youth Reps for the workshop and panel discussion. “I love that …. because I think we do it really well in the community, that civic involvement starts at a young age. I think it's in the middle school curriculum where we teach civics, and they invite members of the community to come in and talk to the civics classes. And I think the school system does a really great job of making sure people understand what their responsibilities are to be a good citizen. So it was really inspiring to see such a variety of ages and people in the room.”

Finally, Mayor Hardi expressed appreciation for the Falls Church 250 Committee’s work putting together the event. “I love the concept, and I'm glad the 250 Committee really harnessed the opportunity and really challenged us. Think about it: What do we want to do with this really momentous birthday for our country? And what do these founding ideals of democracy mean for us?”

By Christopher Jones